"Devin
Won't go to heaven
She's just another lost soul,
About to be mine again
Leave her
we will receive her
It is beyond your control
will you ever meet again"

-Disturbed

"Will you come home and stop this pain tonight
Stop this pain tonight
Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head"

-Blink 182

"All heads are bowed in silence
To remember her last sentence
She answered him knowing what would happen
Her last words still hanging in the air"

-Flyleaf

...To be continued. :)

So I was reading Dominic Deegan to get caught up for friday...

"... I have not forgiven myself. I promised I'd never hurt you, but as soon as things got rough with us that was the first thing I tried to do. I guess neither of us are as strong as we thought we were. I want us to work. I want us to be strong so we can fix this... But we need to work on ourselves before we can work on us. Maybe one day, when the time is right, we'll be together again. I only hope we don't have to wait too long. Goodbye..."

Fear is like a tree
That grows inside of me silently
And you could be my blood
And be a part of me secretly

I've lost a war
I've lost a fight
I've killed a man
Wasted a life

Open my eyes, let me see you
And blow this blinding darkness away
Open my eyes, let me find you
Give me a sign

Hate is like a ghost
That lives inside of me, I plead
For you to be my guide
To be a feeder of my need

I've lost a war
I've lost a fight
I've killed a man
Wasted a life

Open my eyes, let me see you
And blow this blinding darkness away
Open my eyes, let me find you
Give me a sign

Take the world and fold me in
Free the soul behind the sin
The endless dark will be the death of my senses

Take my love and hold it in
Kill the beast under my skin
The endless dark will be the death of my senses

(Open my eyes...)
Open my eyes, let me see you
And blow this blinding darkness away
Open my eyes...
Open my eyes, let me see you
And blow this blinding darkness away
Open my eyes
Give me a sign

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

If you don't send this to at least 8 people....Who cares?

George Carlin

Once upon a time we had a lot to fight for
We had a dream, we had a plan
Sparks in the air, we spread a lot of envy
Didn't have to care once upon a time

Remember when I swore
My love is never ending
And you and I will never die
Remember when I swore
We had it all
We had it all

I'll sail away, it's time to leave
Rainy days, are yours to keep
Fade away, the night is calling my name
You will stay, I'll sail away

Once upon a time we used to burn candles
We had a place to call a home
The dream that we lived
Was better than divine
Every day was like a gift
Once upon a time

Remember when you swore
Your love is never ending
And you and I would never die
Remember when you swore
We had it all
We'd never fall

Sail away, it's time to leave
Rainy days are yours to keep
Fade away, the twilight is calling my name
You will stay, I'll sail away

No reason to lie
No need to pretend
I'm grateful to die
To live once again
I'm fearless to fly
And reach for the end
And reach for the end
ohhohhhohhhohhh...

Sail away

Sail away, it's time to leave
Rainy days are yours to keep
Fade away, the night is calling my name
You will stay, I'll sail away

Sail away
The night is calling my name
Sail away

I feel guilty
my words are empty
no signs to give you
i don't have the time for you

ypu say i'm heartless
and you say i don't care
i used to be there for you
and you've said i seem so dead, that i have changed
but so have you

guilty, guilty i feel so
empty, empty you know how to make me feel

i put a shield upon you
i didn't mean to hurt you
i would have only poisoned your mind
never meant to make you cry

you've been so toughtless
i can see right through you
you used to be there for me
so don't you leave say goodbye
cause you have changed but so have i

i never though that the time and the distance
between us made you so much colder
i'll carry the world on my shoulders

I dumped you again
I don't understand
It's happened before
can't take it no more

These foolish game
Always in loving confusion
I'll take you back
Just to leave you once again

I died in my dreams
What's that supposed to mean?
Got lost in the fire
I died in my dreams
reaching out for your hand
My fatal desire

I've failed you again
'cause I let you stay
I used to pretend
that I felt ok

Just one big lie
Such a perfect illusion
I made you mine
Just to hurt you once again

I died in my dreams..

Fb.. Fvapr gung ynfg gvzr V cbfgrq nobhg jnagvat gb punatr naq jung-abg, V'ir orra qbvat zl erfrnepu. V sbhaq n oybt gung V'ir fgnegrq ernqvat n ybg. Abj V whfg arrq gb sbepr zlfrys gb qb gurfr guvatf. Bs pbhefr zl ovttrfg ceboyrz vf zbgvingvba fgvyy. Va gur zbfg erprag cbfg vg gnyxf nobhg univat fbzrbar be n tebhc bs crbcyr gb tb gb jura lbh snvy be arrq rapbhentrzrag, naq lrn... Gung'f abg fbzrguvat V pna rnfvyl qb. Nyfb, V qba'g xabj ubj gb xrrc zlfrys sebz trggvat qvfgenpgrq. Whfg jevgvat guvf oybt V'ir tbggra qvfgenpgrq n srj gvzrf nyernql. :-/ Nyfb, V qba'g xabj jurer gb ortva. V unir fb zhpu V arrq/jnag gb qb. Yvxr V fnvq orsber, zbfg bs gurz V whfg arrq gb jnvg sbe zbarl. Ohg gurer ner bgure guvatf gung V pna qb juvyr V'z jnvgvat. Guvatf yvxr punatvat zl crefbanyvgl, orvat zber betnavmrq, punatvat fbzr bs zl unovgf. V'z gelvat, ohg vg'f qvssvphyg. V xabj gung bapr V svk nyy gurfr guvatf V jvyy or n ybg unccvre. V jvyy trg gurer fbba. :)

Fb lrn, nobhg gubfr "tbnyf" V gnyxrq nobhg ynfg gvzr. V jvfu V npghnyyl unq n erny tbny, yvxr fbzrguvat gb jbex sbe abj. Gur guvatf V jnf guvaxvat nobhg orsber, fhpu nf fpubby naq bgure, gubfr ner guvatf gung V qba'g ernyyl rkcrpg gb qb sbe n ybbbat gvzr. V zrna, V thrff zl znva tbny vf gb zbir bhg, ohg gung'f zber fbzrguvat whfg gb jnvg sbe, naq gung fubhyq unccra ol Whar/Whyl qrcraqvat ba ubj zhpu zbarl V jnfgr. Vg'f fb zhpu rnfvre gb jnfgr zbarl va gur fhzzre. :-/ Ohg naljnlf, onpx gb jurer V jnf. Rirelbar ryfr V xabj unf fcrpvsvp tbny. V ernyyl qba'g, ohg V fubhyq. V unir abguvat orggre gb qb. Nyy V qb vf jbex naq ort sbe nggragvba. V arrq fbzrguvat gb qb gb xrrc zr ohfl fb V qba'g obgure crbcyr fb zhpu. Zl ceboyrz vf gung V jnag gb qb rirelguvat, naq V jnag vg nyy gb unccra fbbare guna vg ernyvfgvpnyyl pna. V jnag gb geniry, V jnag gb tb rireljurer, V jnag gb tb onpx gb fpubby gb fghql mbbybtl, V jnag gb grnpu zlfrys gur guvatf V gnhtug zlfrys jura V jnf lbhatre, V jnag n chccl, V jnag gb zbir bhg, V jnag gb trg zneevrq naq nyy gung pbzrf jvgu vg... V jnag gb svther bhg jung znqr zr gur jnl V nz... Znlor zl tbny fubhyq or gb znxr n tbny. >.<

Gurer'f guvatf V pna qb:
~Gurer'f guvatf V jnag gb qb nebhaq gur ubhfr, ohg V qba'g jnag gb yvir urer fb gurer vf ab rapbhentrzrag gb qb gubfr guvatf. Urapr gur ernfba zl ebbz vf gur jnl vg vf, bgure guna gur snpg gung gurer vf ab ebbz sbe zr gb yvir va zl bja ubhfr.
~Znlor V'yy fgneg cynlvat jvgu gung byq pbzchgre V unir ntnva. Gur pbzchgre gung jba'g rira jbex jvgu gur vagrearg jr unir abj. :)
~Znlor V'yy fryy rirelguvat V bja ba ronl.
~Znlor V jvyy yvir ba gur fgerrgf ntnva sbe n yvggyr juvyr. Hagvy gur pbcf fgneg punfvat zr. :3
~Znlor V fubhyq trg n frpbaq wbo fb V pna fgneg guvaxvat nobhg zl "erny" tbnyf.
... ohg V jba'g.

V qhaab... V whfg jnag fbzrguvat gb ybbx sbejneq gb. V arrq fbzr fbeg bs ubcr sbe fbzrguvat gb xrrc zr tbvat. V qba'g ernyyl jnag gb tb onpx gb gur cflpub qbpgbe, ohg gung znl or jung V arrq. *fueht* V jbhyq nfx sbe fhttrfgvbaf, ohg.. ab. Ab bar gnxrf zr frevbhfyl rabhtu gb tvir zr erny fhttrfgvbaf. Gnyx gb zr cyrnfr vs lbh guvax lbh pna uryc zr, frevbhfyl.

Naq gurfr ner nyy ovt guvatf. Gurer'f n gba bs yvggyr crefbany guvatf V jnag gb svk nobhg zlfrys, ohg V pna'g qb gung evtug abj. Gurer'f n ybg tbvat ba vafvqr. Znlor bapr guvatf frggyr be ng yrnfg srry zber pbzsbegnoyr, znlor gura V pna svk gubfr guvatf. Ohg bapr ntnva, vg'f fbzrguvat V unir gb jnvg sbe.

ENJE! V qba'g xabj...

V'z fvpx bs orvat gerngvat yvxr fuvg.

Naljnlf, V'ir pbzr gb n ubeevoyr cynpr va zl yvsr. V unir gb pubbfr orgjrra fbzrguvat V ybir, naq nppbzcyvfuvat zl yvsr tbnyf. Vg'f ernyyl gbb onq gung gur guvatf V ybir pna'g nppbzzbqngr gb zl tbnyf. V'z irel fnq naq qvfnccbvagrq ol guvf. Znlor fbzrqnl yngre va yvsr V pna unir gur guvatf gung V ybir onpx, ohg V qba'g jnag gb xrrc zl ubcrf hc, nyfb guvf jbhyq qvfgenpg zr sebz zl tbnyf.

V jvyy cebonoyl qryrgr guvf ol gur raq bs gur jrrx orpnhfr V nz whfg iragvat. Nyfb, nf jr nyy xabj fb jryy V ernq onpx ba guvatf naq znxr zlfrys qrcerffrq. Va snpg, V jnf ernqvat zl byq oybtf. Shaal ubj gur barf nobhg zr orvat unccl znqr zr gur zbfg qrcerffrq. Whyl 28/29, 2005. Lrn, V zvff gubfr qnlf.

V jvfu V xarj ubj gb jevgr. V fhpx ng jbeqvat gurfr glcrf bs guvatf, naq gryyvat crbcyr jung V'z guvaxvat naq ubj V srry. V qhaab, znlor V nz qbvat n tbbq wbo naq vg'f whfg zr. V srry yvxr V qvqa'g guvax guvatf guebhtu nsgre gur snpg.

V srry yvxr fhpu n fghcvq tvey erpragyl. V'z gbb bofrffrq. V nyybj zlfrys gb or hfrq naq gerngrq yvxr fuvg orpnhfr V'z fgvyy va ybir. Ab znggre ubj zhpu V xabj gung vg'f abg tbvat gb jbex, V xrrc zl ubcrf hc...

Htu... V arrq gb tb.